Insanity - II

I believe so many voices - so many thoughts - so many illusions - lucid visions come to me because of books. I have read so many books and still keep on reading that they all make a mess in my brain and cause me to think differently... I guess.
Lot of times I am not so sure whether something I did was in my dreams or in the real world. Or maybe in the world in my brain. Pisceans are actually well known for creating a separate world from their thoughts and living in it. So Am I just another dreamy piscean? But then why do I sometimes feel so lonely? Why do I pine for someone who would be with me at every step?
I was in my second year of college when I first saw the movie - The One - starring Jet Li. The movie had a huge impact on me. Then in my final year I started reading The Wheel Of Time series by Robert Jordan which as per me is one of the best fantasy ever written. It's a class in itself. The movie and the series has one concept in common. The common concept is that of alternate worlds. Of alternate lives. Of different choices that you make. Both are handled differently in the book and movie. But when I think I feel that both are incomplete without the other. I feel that both are fantasy unto themselves. Which is why I propose a merge for the two to myself.
As per the movie - in each alternate universe there is a person that's you. In some it is an expert cook. In some its an expert athlete. In some it may be a beggar. And again in some it may be an assassin. It can be anything and is everything. Here's the connection I make. I believe that knowledge is already inherently stored in our brain and our life is a process of not learning but discovering the knowledge within. When we say we learnt something knew, we actually have discovered something. But have you ever felt that the outcome of something that you are trying for the first time is way beyond your expectations. It may come under any natural/unnatural circumstances. eg. If you go into kitchen and try to prepare a dish for the first time and it urns out to be too good, where did u get the skill from? If u r being chased by a dog and u manage to outrun it where did you get the stamina from? If u start painting/sketching and create a really good image, again where did u get the skill from? All this time I'm talking about part time things we do. Not the things we do professionally.
So my explanation to this phenomenon is that u derive the skill to cook from the "you" in the other dimension who is actually a cook and knows everything well. But that day when u borrowed his skill for just one small moment. The dish he was preparing does not turn out to be good. A one off incident in his life. And that is how u maintain a constant level of skill, stamina, energy, dexterity etc in the entire multitude of universes. Same goes when you outran something. Or suddenly found courage in the face of danger.
But unlike the movie I believe that it is not possible to physically touch the other universes. This part of my theory I pick up from The Wheel Of Time. And my probability theory. One of the mostly debated theological topic is the existence of God. Lot of times people ask me if I believe in God or not. But well.. that may be a topic for another day. So I believe that probability is the law in this world. What choice you make, what will you eat today, whether you would have an accident or not. Everything is ruled by probability. Your actions and probability go hand in hand. Probability for something happening changes with the amount of effort you make towards that. But still probability always has a say in your choices. So my theory is that everytime you make a choice a new universe is created with the other choice. And the strength of the universe is dependent on how strong the probability of that choice was.
There's a famous saying... A man is what he chooses to be. And I believe that to be true. I can look back at my life and see how each choice would have impacted me. I cannot see what would have been the consequences if I would have made another choice. That knowledge is hidden from me and that's for good so that I wouldn't lament. But I do understand that different choices would not have led me here, where I am sitting and writing this blog. When I now look back I see how each choice I made has contributed to me being me. How some of my friends are the result of choices I made years before I even met them.
I believe I am rambling again.. I'll leave it here and continue in my next blog maybe...