Disillusioned..

So, for the past few days I've been feeling very disillusioned. I never was very social and I've already explained in an earlier entry how I find machines to be more trustworthy than humans. But what I'm feeling for the past few days is a new low even for me. Let me bring you up to speed on what's happening around  me and what goes on in my head as a result.

First up, big news, Donald Trump has won the US Presidential Elections. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't happy with either candidate and frankly didn't care about either. Also, it wasn't really a surprise to me that Trump won - my Piscean senses were already tingling the morning of the election day. But the ease with which he won has been one of the major causes for me to lose my faith. My biggest peeve with the internet is the amount of misinformation out there. And Trump won by riding the biggest wave of it. This was one of the ugliest elections I've ever witnessed, where the candidates instead of focusing on policies they would want to draft, focused on each other and the candidate who spoke to the masses' hearts - crude, racist, sexist, bullish language won. Make no mistake - everyone within them harbors a monster. People may be gentle in public but each of them has had a sexist or racist thought sometime and some - nay, most - struggle to hide it, afraid of what the public might think and what they may lose. These things have been a taboo for a long time. And yet, when faced with a candidate that openly talks so, he wins. Why? I've been told it's because of the anger of masses against the government. Maybe. But as FDR once said :

"Let us never forget that government is ourselves and not an alien power over us. The ultimate rulers of our democracy are not a President and senators and congressmen and government officials, but the voters of this country"

And so, if the face of the United States - the leader of free world, is someone who revels in misinformation, personifies vanity, gullibility, immorality, has objectified women and insulted them with crude words - what does it say about the voters. Are we so full of hate that we can justify such a person residing at the top? Slowly and gradually the hate is flowing out in the streets. Once again I'm reminded of what happens in such a state and I'm afraid - I'm actually terrified if such a thing was to happen - but history repeats itself. As Robert Heinlein once observed :

"The America of my time line is a laboratory example of what can happen to democracies, what has eventually happened to all perfect democracies throughout all histories. A perfect democracy, a ‘warm body’ democracy in which every adult may vote and all votes count equally, has no internal feedback for self-correction. It depends solely on the wisdom and self-restraint of citizens… which is opposed by the folly and lack of self-restraint of other citizens. What is supposed to happen in a democracy is that each sovereign citizen will always vote in the public interest for the safety and welfare of all. But what does happen is that he votes his own self-interest as he sees it… which for the majority translates as ‘Bread and Circuses.’

‘Bread and Circuses’ is the cancer of democracy, the fatal disease for which there is no cure. Democracy often works beautifully at first. But once a state extends the franchise to every warm body, be he producer or parasite, that day marks the beginning of the end of the state. For when the plebs discover that they can vote themselves bread and circuses without limit and that the productive members of the body politic cannot stop them, they will do so, until the state bleeds to death, or in its weakened condition the state succumbs to an invader—the barbarians enter Rome.”

I never believed that but I've been led to believe now that I've seen this election. The candidate who created the best circus show and offered bread to the masses won. And the voters simply ignored all the faults of the candidate - for he was offering them the things they want the most. Quoting the candidate Donald J Trump himself :

"I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn't lose voters"

Anyway, enough has been written about Trump and I don't want to continue to harp about him since he's not the sole reason for my disillusionment.

And here steps in the not-so-racist-or-sexist-Donald-Trump-of-India (or NSROSDTOI for short.. :P), Arvind Kejriwal.

Similarities :
They're always right. Don't mind the facts.

Flip flops on various issues : DJT and AK say what gives them political mileage and makes them look better in the eyes of middle and lower class voters and they do not mind changing there positions as needed.

Demonizing the competition : DJT and AK spoke vehemently against the opposition before the elections promising legal actions if they win - Hillary Clinton and Sheila Dixit. As soon as the opposition was vanquished, they do not want to pursue any legal action anymore.

Promising Bread and Circus : AK promised free water, electricity, wifi, security cameras on every road, cheap food, medical aid and what not before the elections. I wonder if he was major landowner would he have promised a free flat to everyone as well?

Anyway, given that AK has had nearly two years stint as CM of Delhi - which is not a state - another huge gripe of his (Wonder if he did not know that when he fought the election?) he has little to show and blames everyone else but himself for that. It's not his fault that he picked fights with the Administrator for Delhi - the LG. I studied that UTs are run by Governors and not governments in 8th grade and still remember that. AK is an IITian and an ex-IRS serviceman. He continues to pick fights with Narendra Modi, the PM, now that BJP is the biggest opposition to his fledgling party. And that makes me wonder again - what does he expect the PM to do. A PM is not supposed to run a state or UT. And if he expects the PM to listen to him - again that's not his job. A CM isn't supposed to advise a PM on any national or international matter unless specifically asked to do so. If it's about your state, yes, sure.

Then there's Brexit. I've earlier written how I envision a world without borders. EU was a POC in my opinion towards a bigger more connected and open border world where everyone was free to move within the member nations. There was an environment of cohabitation and collaboration. But Britain decides that it's superior to others, can't carry them all and decides to exit, thereby bursting that bubble. While I agree that an open border world will be most detrimental to the developed nations but it'll also be the first step towards global equality. Bringing the underdeveloped nations - the third world countries up to the level of developed nations will take some time of course, a lot of it, but the developed nations need to remember that their development has been paid for by those third world nations themselves. So it's morally and ethically the right thing to do when you support the third world nations and help them build and develop. It's a chicken move to leave them to rot and run away and hide within one's own borders.

So that is what brews within me. I've never been a fan of democracy. My stand on it can be summarized by Churchill's words :

"Democracy is the worst form of government, except for all the others."


And this summarizes my loss of hope and faith, again by Churchill :

"The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter."

I've had that conversation. And the last two quotes hence lead me to the hopeless conclusion - Unless the average voter makes sure to get the correct information, is able to correctly choose the person that is better for - whatever is the highest area that's impacted - city, state, country or world and ignores the people who peddle Breads and Circus (liquor and money in India), a democratic state can never succeed for long. Democracy is a compromise and not a perfect solution as Mussolini, a dictator who climbed to power through democracy, observed :

"Democracy is beautiful in theory; in practice it is a fallacy."

 I leave you with this quote to figure out the future of such a state whose voters think for themselves :

"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to eat for lunch."

Oh! And you can feel free to switch lambs and wolves - in every possible scenario someone is going to be hungry or someone is going to be eaten. 

Tinted Glasses

I've already written a blog about how much it peeves me to hear the phrase "It depends" to a simple Yes/No answer. Let me add to that. I absolutely hate it when people turn a bias into a defense for their thinking.
The bias could take any form. "You haven't lived here long enough so you don't know", "You are a girl/guy so you wouldn't understand", "You've never worked under my manager so you don't know".
This is how it happens.. Two people start talking about something. One explains a particular issue they are having in their life and asks for others' advice. The other starts advising but the advice is soon thrown out of the window coz "No I couldn't do this and you wouldn't understand because you " 
Why is this a pet peeve now? Coz all my life I've dedicated time to observe people. So much that I don't even like being around most based on my observations. And there's a difference between a quick judgement and forming an opinion based on observations. Amazingly, people do not understand the difference. I digress. So, I love knowledge and I love observing people. Combine that and you get someone with a decent enough understanding of how people work. I've seen friends, family, colleagues come to me to talk about their issues and get advice since they know I weigh everything and provide them a neutral view free from bias. And yet, often I get the "You don't understand coz.." because the other party refuses to comprehend the complex logic behind things.
No clue where I'm going with this but whatever.

Noise. Chaos. Mess.

As I mentioned in the last blog that there are a lot of thought chains running in my head and about 7-8 topics I've wanted to write about. Well, they're just increasing in intensity and strength. So it seems that not all people are able to comprehend the world in the same way that I do. It also seems that people are prone to find another person's life perfect. So much so that they would try to find the worst thing that annoys them and turn it into their tormentor.
I did it once. Funny thing is, I found it annoying how some people close to me loved me while so many others crave for affection. I started distancing myself from them and was successful. But how can someone stop love? Lot of them still love me, I just don't give them a chance to show.
Once I did, I craved for affection. But I couldn't return.

Perfection

There have been around 7 or 8 topics over the past few weeks on which I've wanted to pen down my thoughts. But well, I'm married now and the blog has taken a backseat.. Not that I was churning out blogs by dozens before. But I can finally use marriage as an excuse for once, so just lemme.

The foremost among all topics that have been bugging me is Perfection.What is it? Who defines it? Can anyone achieve it? Has there been anybody who was just perfect in each and every way. I've never worn suits but these ads have always attracted me and egged me on to find perfection. Weird - right? But well.. that's how it has always been.

Of late, I've been told - Nobody is perfect and one shouldn't try to achieve it. It's hopeless/worthless/waste of time - pick one. Instead one should live life to it's fullest. This has caused me to look back on pretty much my whole life in which every action I took was to move forward to be a better person. Better by whose standards, you ask? Mine. I believe perfection like beauty, lies in the eyes of the beholder. For someone begging at a street light, a guy in Mercedes may seem to have a perfect life. Or not. As I said, eyes of the beholder.

Broke the chain of thought.. Rest may follow later..

Stupid List #1 - Left handed stuff

So I sprained my right thumb/wrist last Friday and as it's in a splint, have to use only one hand for various activities. For some stupid reason I thought about what I can and can't do with just my left hand and wanted to actually list it out.. This may be an evolving list as I discover more:

Things I can do with Left Hand only :

1. Eat
2. Type - Write a blog
3. Attend and make phone calls
4. Use a laptop to watch movies
5. Pour myself juice in a glass and drink
6. Clean the dishes
7. Laundry
8. Vacuum the floors
9. Write (in a crude but discernible way)
10. Play basic arcade games like candy crush and HoC
11. Make my bed
12. Shopping.. :P
13. Use chopsticks!! :D

Things I can't do with Left Hand only:
1. Cook
2. Drive
3. Photography using my current DSLR
4. Sketching (Though to be fair, I haven't tried this yet..)

People vs Machines

So the ideas behind this entry have been going on in my mind for a couple of months now, but I just couldn't get to it. Back in the US, I'm trying to get back to " the high energy levels with low sleep while getting a lot of things done " self, and so haven't been spending time on hobbies as much. Today, something changed.

So as I said - I've been thinking about machines and people. And how I trust the machines a lot more than I trust people - which doesn't mean that I don't trust people. Just that if I was stuck in the middle of a lake, I would prefer a remote controlled boat with the remote in my hand over a person standing on the shore watching my predicament.

People are fickle. Machines are not. My computer has 3 hours and 19 minutes worth of battery left  and if I do not charge it, it's not gonna complain - maybe remind me but never accuse me until it's dead (switch off due to lack of electricity). In my dictionary that's selflessness though to argue the point there is not self in case of machines. But that is what makes machines different from humans and slightly more reliable. If a machine stops working - there is always a logical reason. If a person stops talking, or changes their behaviour - logical may just be a perspective.

Now this thought originated while listening to one of my American friends talk about his other Indian friends suddenly behaving hypocritically. I have always believed that we as Indians learn the art of hypocrisy (or softly putting it - art of being politically correct) at a very young age. We love manipulating people - mostly coz it adds to the drama that happens around us and we love drama. However, a lot of people do not understand that and still believe in the age old ways of "Do I have your word?" and take you on it. But when the "sudden circumstances" stop you from keeping your word - they do not understand. And this is where the machines start gaining an edge. The sudden circumstances are mostly related to the comfort of self. Oh well! It was so hot and we were tired so we couldn't do this. However, the machines would blow themselves out trying to do what they were supposed to.

The thought compounded by the additional observations I made around myself - looking at various people and different transactions happening and actually seeing how little people in the world today are ready to go out of their way to help someone.

The thoughts going through my mind today - have been a huge swing factor in favor of the machines.
Because, there's no thinking involved and there's no sense of self - there are no ego clashes while dealing with machines. There's no one who has to be better or worse. A logical plan can be implemented flawlessly if machines are involved. That's coz the human factor is reduced. We have six sigma process for creation of machines to reduce the errors and to achieve flawlessness. We discard the machines that do not live upto the quality standards. No such process exists for humans.

As usual, I can go on and on - but wanna get some sleep and before concluding let me mention (and kinda repeat) - this does not mean that I'm anti-human.. Mistakes are what make us human. However, sometimes dealing with humans can get a whole lot frustrating - well.. just coz they're humans. With machines - logic always works.

Of Cocoons and Tortoise shells

I rarely read self-help books. I believe, and you would know this if you've read my past blogs, that the knowledge is inherently present in the human brain and more than learning - education is about discovering and connecting the dots. One of the few that I once picked and didn't finish coz I found it boring and nothing new to learn was "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus". One of the things it says about men is that men are like a rubber-band. I kind of agree - though I do not like that analogy much and imagine a different meaning. Men will stretch to accommodate other's needs, esp. any special women they have in life - but with each stretch there comes an uneasiness. A need of liberation. And soon, there comes a point where they need to retreat back to the original position or will break. Alternately, u can pick the opinion of the book. And about women - it says that they are like the waves. Rise and Fall.

And this was why I didn't read any further. If you delve into it - both the behaviors are very similar. Stretch and Return. Rise and Fall.

Nyways - I didn't wanna talk about the book in this entry. That just came to my mind coz it was kind of related.

Recently, I've adopted a better analogy for the behavior between men and women. And I'm not gonna be specific about who does what - coz frankly that's not how the human brain works. A woman can as surely be a "rubber band" as a man can be "wave". The analogy I propose is of cocoons and tortoise shells.

All men and women have various ways to deal with things. Time to time when things get overwhelming - stretching of rubber band or a height of the wave or whatever other analogies you wanna use - they use these systems as a way to cope up. What I observe is two major kinds of retreat systems:

Cocoon : This kind of retreat system involves surrounding yourself with things you like and completely ignoring the things that you don't. To the point that someone can pick u up, toss you into boiling water and you won't notice until it's too late. This is a very comforting kind of retreat system and a preferred way of introspection. If you survive the time spent in it and continue the introspection process, at the appropriate time - which could be days to weeks - when you emerge you feel renewed. Ready to take on the world. Like you've added a new dimension to yourself. Until things get bad again and you remember how comforting the cocoon was and try to retreat.

Tortoise Shell : This kind of retreat system can be cumbersome. Unlike the cocoon which takes days to weeks, this kind of system is carried around everywhere and u can be in and out in a blink. At the first sign of things going South, you retreat into the shell. But unlike the cocoon, you are not blind here. So if a life threatening situation arises - you see it coming and may choose to act. Like the cocoon, the shell provides a familiar surrounding, thereby reassuring you. But unlike the cocoon, it also provides robustness. You can retreat and easily deflect all kinds of personal attacks. And still keeping an eye on the proceedings so as soon as u find a way out - you take it. This is the typical escapist approach. Deflect until the attack is over or you get an opportunity to run. However, because all the time goes in carrying the shell around, there's barely any time left for true introspection. You live longer - but you would never emerge out of the shell as a changed person.

Now, this is a topic about retreat systems - so don't get any "Why don't you take things head on" kind of ideas. Personally, shell is my favorite - however I've tried to reduce the time of hibernation in cocoon and have found them to be really effective for personal growth.

That's All Folks!!